Saturday, April 2, 2011

A Letter For My Mom.

Dear Mom,


Your birthday is coming up again, and I've been spending a lot of time thinking of you. It's the second birthday without you, and while it's a little easier than it was last year, I still really miss you.  I can't believe you've been gone almost 2 years.


I often wonder if you can see what's going on down here, and, if you can, how do you feel about it?  A lot has changed.  My health has been a bit of a challenge, but I am managing. I left a job that you know I was miserable in for a long long time, even though I was good at it.  I've grown spiritually, and emotionally, and everything that has happened has made me a better person. At least, I hope it has.  I like to think that you'd be proud of me.


David has grown so much. He's not a baby anymore.  He's doing well in school, despite his issues, and he's a sweet and loving kid.  He still reminds me a lot of daddy, but his sense of humour reminds me so much of you. He's really awesome, and I'm glad you got to meet him. 


Although sometimes, the pain of missing you is really bad, I'm doing okay. No need to worry. I think I did a lot better when you died than when daddy did because now it's about more than me. I'm a mother now, and I have David to take care of.  Please don't think that means I loved you any less, because I have and always will love you with everything I have. I'm just a stronger person now, I have to be.  Plus, in the end, you suffered a lot, and I'm grateful that you found rest.


I think about you every day, mom, and I hope you know that. I try not to dwell on  the hard stuff, since I prefer to remember your laughter and happy spirit. That is the greatest gift you gave to me, and I hope that some day David says the same of me.


I love you,
Tara







5 comments:

  1. I am very proud of you :) xx

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  2. I know that writing this stuff down helps you feel better, if you are anything like me.
    Your mom must have been very special and she is having fun with Carter and my dad and Marilyn my friend who died of breast cancer. They can see us and hear us and are with us in spirit and in our hearts forever.
    Let the funk be gone,
    Time to move on,
    A lesson sort,
    The battle fort:)

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  3. Your momma is very proud of you...and with good reason...you are an awesome PERSON. I wish I had met her to thanks her and your pops for giving us such a wonderful gift called Tara.

    Luvs ya,
    Becky

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  4. well, Tara...

    You managed to bring tears to my eyes with this one...I know your mom was and continues to be proud of you - and that she is probably bragging to everyone about what a neat daughter she has...and an equally neat grandson...

    Your mom was a great woman...she faced a lot of challenges in her life - and did so with dignity...and I know that you carry a lot of her in you...

    Thank you for sharing this letter to your mom...my sister...

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