A Look Ahead at 2012

Here we are, at the start of another new year. I swear the years are getting shorter, but, well, that's probably that pesky ageing process. In any event, we're here, and we have a whole new year laid out before us on which to imprint a little bit of ourselves.

You're most likely going to read a slew of posts in the next little while talking about resolutions. This won't be one of them.  I don't really make resolutions. I believe that if you want or need to make a change in your life, you should do it when it feels right, and maybe that way you'll find it easier to stick to.  Why wait until some random moment to improve? Live in the moment!


That said, I'd be lying if I didn't admit that this time of year does tend to push me into doing some deep thinking and analysis of where my life is headed. I look  at the past twelve months and try to figure out what, if anything, I've learned, and where I'd like to see myself going in the next year. Then I decide how to make that happen. Are they resolutions? I'm sure some people will say so, but I don't call them that. To me, a resolution is just something you think of because you feel like you have to do something. I set loose goals, things I want to do, things I will do, but they're not the standard things like losing weight, or quitting smoking, or any of those things.


If you read my last post, which I hope you did, you'd see I learned quite a lot about myself. I started this blog, which pretty much triggered a landslide of creative endeavours.  I discovered photography, and I started painting again. Most of all, I felt GOOD about these things. As a kid, I was very creative, and imaginative, but it wasn't really ever nurtured in me, so I never really accepted that I was any good at anything creative. I don't think it was intentional, so this won't turn into a huge 'bash Tara's parents' post. It's just how it was.


In 2011, I was fortunate enough to spend some time with people who really helped me see that I could try my hands at whatever I wanted, and not stress so much about the end result. Sure, I'd love for everything I do to turn out well, but art for me is so much more about the process.  When I create, it feeds something in me, and when that part of me is sated, it just sends so much energy to the rest of me that makes me so good inside. And when you feel good, you tend to spread  that feeling to others. Don't get me wrong, I'm by no means a master of every art form I attempt, but you know what? Who cares? It's okay.


I feel like 2012 is my year. I've got some big big plans.  I want to continue to improve my writing, so to that end, I'm going to be building my own personal website, which I hope to have going by mid to late January. The website will be the new home for this blog.  I'm also starting a new blog, which I've finally named. It will be called Epic WINnipeg, and it will be all about my passion for my hometown.  I really hope you'll like it.


I would also like to continue learning and growing as a photographer. I have no formal training, but I am learning all the time, and it's a huge labour of love for me. Froot Loops and family will have a role in this progression too. They have a big big project coming up, but I'm not going to tell you what that is. You'll have to wait for my website to be up to find out!  Soon, my pretties!


I'm also going to be working on my painting. Of all the things I do, I'm probably least comfortable with my painting skills, which means I need to do it more! Practice practice practice! I'm a big fan of doing things that make you uncomfortable, since it's a sure fire way to find growth. 


Away from the creative side, I want to continue to enjoy life with my boy and friends and family. I've really enjoyed how much more relaxed as a person I've been the last year. Things haven't gone entirely smoothly, but overall I find I'm just in a better place, and I think that benefits others just as much as it benefits me. I'd like to be able to pay it forward too. I've had a lot of people who've been so helpful and supportive, and I'd like to give back in that regard. In the last little while, I was able to do that financially, and I did, but that won't always be the case, so I look forward to finding other ways to make life better for those around me.


Big big things ahead this year for me! What are you looking forward to in 2012? Leave me a note in the comments below!


Cheers!
Tara

Ponderings

I absolutely love this time of year.  Warm weather, blue skies, sunshine.  There's just so much to do, and so much to see. Beauty abounds, it really does.  Don't get me wrong, there's a certain beauty to the winter, but for me, summer is where it's at. 


One of my favourite things to do in the summer is walk.  Not only is it good exercise, but it's a good time to think, and unwind.  In the past, I've needed a purpose to my walks.  I found that I would tend to give up if I didn't  have to be somewhere. 


Something's changed though.  I've started enjoying looking out at my city, and seeing all the beauty that's out there.  Even in the scruffiest of neighbourhoods, there's beauty to be found.  To that end, I started making sure that I never leave the house without my camera and video camera.  Too many times I'd see something that I'd really like and wish I had my camera.  That doesn't happen now.


At first, it was a little difficult.  I'd spend so much time "looking" for a good shot that I often missed the most interesting things.  I thought that I had to take my photos based on what I thought others would like, when all along, the only person I had to please was me. So, I started taking pictures of what interested me, and soon enough, I found that it was second nature.


These days, when I go on my camera walks, I let the camera decide where we're going. I know that sounds like a really odd thing to say, but it's pretty much what happens.  I don't plan, really, other than deciding on a direction to start out in.  I do what feels right.    That really works for me.  I take a lot of photos that look interesting to me, and people seem  to like them as well.  At first I worried that they were only humouring me, but as I get more comfortable with it, my confidence has soared.  


Today, I had some child free time, and my cameras and I went out for a walk.  And soon enough, I was in my zone, taking my photos and feeling good.  As I walked, I got an idea for a painting I wanted to do, and an idea for another project I had been planning, and I started thinking about how awesome life is.  Sure, there are troubles that come up sometimes, and it's not always easy, but it's definitely worth it to be alive, and to get out there and experience the world.  It's so easy to get trapped in a negative mindset, but I just can't do it.  There's just so much to be happy for.


I walked through a park, and was looking at this piece that had all these sayings on it, and while I was snapping off pictures I realized how happy I am that this creative side of me was unleashed.  I love creating, and the more I create, the more I want to create, and the more I feel I have to create.  Taking pictures is definitely what I feel drawn to, it's like a living, breathing being that needs to come out, or it'll eat me from the inside out.  You know, nothing dramatic, or anything.   Hehehe. 


I think that, when I grow up, I want to be a photographer.  I think I've got a pretty good eye, and, while I don't know much about the finer points of photography, I can certainly learn, can't I?  It feels right, so I'm definitely going to see what I can do to further this goal, and in the meantime, I'm going to keep snapping away.

My New Addiction

Hi all.


I can't believe it's been more than a week since my last post! Once again, I'm a bad, bad Tara.  Oops.  The pox came through the house, and there was some other chaos too, but hopefully that's behind us now, and we can move on.


I thought today I'd fill you in about one of my passions: tattoos. It's sort of a newer thing with me. I actually got my first one in 2004, but I didn't get the 2nd until late 2010, and that is when it really took hold.


I absolutely LOVE tattoos.  A good tattoo is a work of art. In a way, I guess I am like an art gallery.  My body is the canvas on which the art is displayed.  I'm very proud to display them too, because each one has a lot of thought put into it, and a special meaning to me.  Plus, you know, there's just a certain sexiness with the juxtaposition of a sweet girl with a tattooed body. When I show my tats it's like releasing my inner rockstar. We've all got a little rockstar inside us.


My first tattoo is of a panther walking through flames.  It's in honour of my dad. To me, the flames are life's trials, and the panther making it through unscathed means that no matter how tough things get, I'll always make it through okay.  I've got that one on my calf.  I actually bought it as a temporary tattoo because it was cute, and carried it around for two years before I decided to make it permanent. I think keeping it so long is the reason  I don't regret getting it.  


After that, I really wanted another, but I don't believe in getting tattooed just for the sake of doing it.  Plus, shortly after the first one, I became a mother, and the practical side of me couldn't justify spending the money.


My second tattoo is a monarch butterfly on my right forearm.  I will admit that this one is a bit of an impulsive thing.  I'd been chatting on Twitter with a local tattoo artist, and he showed me something he wanted to do, and I just had to do it.  It's funny, because I'm not really a butterfly person, but it was just too beautiful. Plus, it was sort of fitting, because I am going through a metamorphosis of sorts in my life.


Tattoo 3 and 4 I actually got the same day, because, well, I could.  All my life, I've been madly in love with Hello Kitty.  She's like an old friend.  I found a picture of her dressed like a geisha, and fell in love. When the opportunity came up, I showed my guy the picture, and he came up with a drawing that I loved. Now my friend sits on my left shoulder blade.


The other tattoo I got that day is a pink ribbon on my left forearm to honour my mother, who lost her left breast to cancer. She wasn't really happy with me when I got the first tattoo (the only one she saw), but somehow, I think she'd like it.


That's all I've got now, but I definitely see more in my future. I've got ideas for at least 3 more, now all I need is a magical money tree to make them a reality. :)


How about you? Do you have any tattoos?  Do you want any?  Leave me a comment below and let me know!  In the meantime, enjoy my photos.


Cheers, 
Tara

Feeling Inspired.

Afternoon all.


So, this sort of goes back to a post about art that I wrote about a week ago. I've been thinking a lot about this topic, and what is and isn't art. Well, more like obsessing. 


Last night, I visited my artist friend's studio space, and my eyes were really opened to all the beauty in the world. It's not normally something I would do, in fact, upon being asked, I probably would have told you I wouldn't enjoy all that "artsy fartsy crap."


But, I left my comfort zone, which has been a huge issue for me. I tend to stick to myself, and the same boring activities. I tend to get uncomfortable around groups of people.  You know what though? It was fantastic! I think it was helpful  that I went with only two people, and they were people I trust. There was so much there to see and do, and I soaked it all in, and before I knew it, I just wanted to create.


To that end, I wrote a couple of new poems last night using those little magnet words. I found it so interesting, because the words are there, you just have to use them.  They're unedited, for the most part, because I find that I tend to second guess myself so much when I write that it loses all the original feeling.  


Enjoy!


Languid beauty
sky goddess
delicate mother, please whisper
who but me aches after we part?
A sweet symphony of luscious time
above the void...
I fall with you.


........


chocolate finger,
enormous lust beneath the picture
manipulate through the spring garden and trudge deliriously
Elaborate the light, and think summer
Drive fast and leave no shadow, but stop and dream.
Vision is gorgeous
love the moment
smell my honey.

Art

Morning!


So, it's not quite 2 a.m. and I find myself awake. I'm not usually an insomniac, but lately, as I've started letting my creative side out, I've found myself staying up later. It's when the juices tend to flow.


As I write this, I'm laying in my bed, laptop and a glass of pinot grigio close at hand, television set to the Food Network. I'm thinking. Come on now, it's not all that rare. I've been known to think from time to time, I just hide it well.


I'm thinking about art, and artists.  I've never considered myself an artist, even though I do have a tendency to be creative. Maybe that's because in the past, when I've thought about art, I've always thought about paintings, and drawings, and such.  I don't paint, and I can't draw, so, clearly I'm not an artist, right?


In the last few months though, I've come to realize that art is everywhere, and in everything. Really, when you think of it, in one way or another, we're all artists. Some artists paint or sculpt, some artists style hair, some draw. I write, and take silly photos, and make videos. It may not seem like it to some, but it's how I express myself, and it exercises my creative self, and so, it's my art. My idea of art is very likely different from another's idea of art, and that is okay. We don't need to all be on the same page.


I guess that what I'm getting at is that art, like so many things in life, is subjective. What's art to me may not be art to you. Which leads me to my question: what do YOU think of when you think of the word "art?"  Leave me a comment, let's have a discussion.


Happy Creating,
Tara.